Vampire Dean is hotness.

So in the first 15 minutes of last night’s Supernatural I figured my blog (if I got to it, yes I am fail) would center on the Twilight thing but thankfully along came Sam to make me not care that much about the cheesiness of the Twi shots.  Sorry, SPN, I expect better than Robert and Kristen and sparkles and straight up dialog rips from you and you didn’t make me laugh but once or twice during the shots at Twi.  It’s all been done a billion times before and I thought you’d bring something fresh to it but you didn’t.  I guess some were amused, judging by Twitter, but I truly was let down.

Didn’t matter, though, because like most “funny” SPN episodes, you went beyond that and showed something important.  Now, everybody knew something was off with Sam but I don’t think anybody expected him to just stand by and actually fucking smile while his brother was being attacked by and then fed vamp blood.  Sam could have stopped it but he chose to sit back and let it happen, ostensibly to let Dean infiltrate the vamp nest and lead them to the alpha vamp.  I’ve pretty much disliked Sam since he called Dean weak about 450 times in season 4 but as of that moment he was officially dead to me.  I don’t care if he’s Satan in disguise, I hate that character and I wanted Dean to shoot him in the face last night after he asked if he had his back and Sam lied right to his face.

What I thought was interesting was that Samuel for once came off as possibly not being on the same page as Sam.  He called him out on the possibility of him letting Dean get vamped so that he could find out more information and Sam denied it but we all knew it was true.  He also denied knowing about the all too convenient never before heard of “cure” that Samuel claims he told him about.  If Samuel was on the same mission that Sam was, I think he would have been all for the vamp Dean plan.  But he seemed to actually maybe care about his grandson unlike his dick of a brother.  So, I’m interested to see where this divergence is and what is behind it.

I’m unsure about the “trip” that Dean went on in the vamp nest and I haven’t rewatched the episode where we last saw Raphael but it occurred to me that maybe he is behind all the “weird” monsters and the sudden “alpha” vamps and dijins and whatnot.  What if Raph is trying to keep the hunters busy while he wages war in heaven, so that Dean (let’s face it, he’s likely the one, again) can’t help Cas take him down?  There was a man in Dean’s trip and I couldn’t tell if it was Raph or not but that would be interesting.

And what if Sam is on said Team Raphael?  Say Satan’s still kicking in there or some other evil being…maybe he’s hopping on board to be the next leader of hell and really just wanted Dean to vamp out so he could find out what was up?  May be a stretch, may not.  I’m not sure.  We know Sam’s not Sam but we don’t know the whys or hows at this point.  I’m hoping next week gives a few answers.  Love that Dean goes to Bobby and Cas about Sam.  Cannot wait.

Also good, in my book, was the possible farewell to Lisa.  I’m not getting my hopes up for good but Dean scared her and she’s not taking his calls and stupid Ben got pushed (too bad it probably didn’t give him any personality back) so maybe she’ll do the right and normal thing and say goodbye.  We’ll see.  I’m hoping she’s gone for awhile.  Dean needs to concentrate on whatever is going on with Sam.

And just let me take a moment to celebrate how fucking hot Dean was as a vampire.  When he shoved Lisa against the wall and nearly kissed her….yum.  When he was in that nest killing vamps right and left….double yum.  When he was sitting there with his foot on the head of ugly vamp that changed…good God.  The only thing that sucked was the ugly teeth but thankfully we only saw those once or so. hehe I prefer no fangs or just the two pretty ones like the True Blood vamps rock.  Thank you.

GAH!

Jensen took me from those sexy highs to just utter heartbreak at the look on his face when he realized that Sam could have saved him and elected not to.  And then when Sam was a LYING LIAR THAT LIES right to his face.  Gah.  I look forward to punches being thrown next week.  I wish Dean could kill him but that would probably damage him too much.    Bobby should.  Thank you.

So, overall, good episode.  Twi stuff was too cheesy but the rest more than made up for it.  And there are two T’s in Pattinson, Sam.  I’ll take one of him and one of your brother and you can go rot in hell where you belong.  As my title says, Die Sammy, Die.

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First & Ten Teaser

By popular demand, here’s a teaser for tomorrow’s update:

“Bella, are you okay?” I asked, kissing the line of her jaw.

“Mmmm,” she responded and I laughed and nipped her chin.  “Edward?”

“Yeah?”

“I want to marry your fingers.  Or your tongue.  Both of them really.  Would that make me a bigamist?”  I couldn’t stop myself from laughing long and hard at that one.

“Well, they’re all yours, whether you make honest organs out of them or not.”  Digits?  Limbs?  Who cared, she could have them all.

She giggled and shook her head.  “I say the craziest shit to you and you never run away.  Why is that?”

I couldn’t really explain it if I tried.  “I love the things you say.”  I just plain love you, but I don’t think you’re ready to hear it and I know I’m not ready to say it yet.  That would wait.  She may not believe me if I said it now anyway.

Her hands began to move over my chest again and she stroked my abs again.  I had a feeling she rather liked them.  “You know, there’s a certain part of my body that’s a little offended that you don’t want to marry it as well.”  My cock was rock hard and wanted a little attention himself.

She smirked and slid her hands down to my jeans, flicking open the button and undoing the zipper.  “Hmmm, well, I need to check that part out before I decide if I want to make a life-long commitment.”  I realized vaguely that I should be scared as hell that we were joking about Bella marrying parts of my body but I wasn’t.  Of course, that could be because her hands had found and were beginning to stroke my cock.  I kicked off my shoes and lifted my hips so Bella could slide my jeans and boxers down.

Her eyes widened as my cock popped free and she let out some mixture of a gasp and a laugh that had me more than a little offended.  My dick wasn’t little so I had no idea what the hell she was laughing at.  “What’s so funny?  It’s not polite to laugh at a guy’s cock, you know?”  I tried to keep my voice light but I could hear the irritation in my tone and I could tell she did too because she patted my dick like it was some kind of dog she was soothing.

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NFL Week 5 Picks

Uh yeah, this is late and I have no idea how I did last week other than bad.  This is going to be short and to the point because I am watching my Noles play Miami.  Next week will be better, I promise.

Jacksonville over Buffalo

Cincy over Tampa

Atlanta over Cleveland

Detroit over St. Louis

Indy over KC

Green Bay over Washington

Chicago over Carolina

Baltimore over Denver

Houston over Giants

New Orleans over Arizona

San Diego over Oakland

Dallas over Tennessee

Philly over San Fran

Jets over Minnesota

That’s all I’ve got for ya, more next week, I promise.

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NFL Week 4 Picks

And we are steadily improving!  10-6 last week!  Of course I was an overtime away from being 11-5, but we won’t quibble on crappy kickers for NO.  Who, by the way, is the Tim Tebow Bench Player of the Week!  I don’t even know his name and can’t be bothered to look it up, but I do know that he has indeed been benched in favor of 63 year old John Carney.  Congrats, nameless kicker!

My team is off this week, which means I get to watch 3 games and not have any stress.  I like it!  And Tampa needs the break after their Pitt beatdown.  On to the picks:

Atlanta over San Francisco:  I don’t care how many coaches SF fires, they’re not getting picked by me again.  Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me three times?  I’m a fucking idiot who will NEVER pick you again.  Enjoy losing.  I no longer like you, Singletary.  Atlanta’s fresh off a big win over NO and I expect them to ride the momentum.

New York Jets over Buffalo:  Um…what can I say about this game?  I still only knew a few Buffalo players, Fitzpatrick at QB and CJ Spiller because he went to Clemson.  Maybe every week I’ll learn a new one?  Anyway, they hung with New England which is a HUGE indictment on NE’s crappy defense.  The Jets do not have a crappy defense.  Blow out city.

Cincy over Cleveland:  Maybe this week the Bengals offense will do something?  Maybe?  Maybe not.  Either way, they’re playing the Browns.  Nuff said.

Green Bay over Detroit:  Man, are there some crappy match ups this weekend or what?  Seriously, I’m not even having to think about these first four.  Now I will probably lose them all, which will be awesome. hehe  Green Bay is going to play well after their flagfest against the Bears.

Tennessee over Denver:  I really have no idea, but I hate Tebow so I decided I will pick against his team whenever I’m unsure.  Maybe Tenn will play consistently two weeks in a row.  We shall see.

Seattle over St. Louis:  Seattle keeps winning, which I find unfathomable but maybe Hasselbeck really isn’t as old as his hairline says he is?  Maybe Carroll is actually a good coach?  No, that is certainly not it.  The Rams are showing signs of life so this is actually a toss up but I’ll go with the vet over the rookie, this time.

New Orleans over Carolina:  Okay, three weeks in a row the champs have not looked like champs.  They move the ball okay but that special something they had last year is gone.  Super Bowl hangover?  Maybe.  Old and injured players?  Probably.  Hungry teams coming after them?  Yeah.  They need to get their stuff together or they’ll be looking up at Atlanta.  Fortunately for them, Carolina truly blows.  Blow out again.

Pittsburgh over Baltimore:  I get this game!  And I could not be more excited about it.  Big time, hard hitting, hate filled game.  LOVE.  Low scoring, defensive battle.  Pitt’s defense has won me over, completely, after just seeing a few minutes of them against Tampa. Flacco’s finding his rhythm with Boldin but I think Pitt will disrupt it.  Gonna ride Pitt to the playoffs so may as well pencil them in as wins even if Joe the janitor is their QB.

Houston over Oakland:  Alright, Houston, you and I need to have a discussion.  EVERY YEAR.  You do the opposite of what I say every single year.  How dare you defy me against Dallas?  Got your asses kicked.  I was not impressed.  However, you have Oakland, so you know, you don’t have to try too hard.  Enjoy and get your crap together.

Indy over Jacksonville:  Manning is having a monster year already and my new boyfriend Austin Collie is making plays all over the field.  I heard he’s injured but likely to play, which pleases me as he is pretty.  Jax is up and down yet again and they’ll probably play Indy tough but you know my motto:  In Manning I Trust (unless it’s Eli, but we’ll get to that).

Philly over Washington:  This pains me because I am 100% Team McNabb over Vick.  Donnie Mack got a hard time in Philly and I’d love for him to light up his former team.  But the Philly receivers are about 3023 times better than the Redskin’s receivers and Wash just looks old and used up, no matter how good Donovan plays.  Vick is looking like the Vick of old, except he can actually throw now.  Philly, but I think it’ll be close.

San Diego over Arizona:  It’s October, so SD can stop losing games they should win now.  Fortunately for them, they’re playing AZ, who would probably be better served having Joe the Janitor that Pittsburgh has as their backup QB  than their actual starter Anderson.  One more week of fail and it’ll be time to let Hall have a chance.  I love hearing from people that they wish QBward was the actual QB of the Cards…as do I, ladies, as do I!  I’d get a sure win most weeks!

Chicago over the NY Giants:  Damn it, I could not hate this game more.  Chicago is overachieving (yes, they are) and the Giants are stinking up the field.  It’s the perfect trap game in which the subpar team rises up.  Yet, I’m going with the undefeated one.  The Bears do have a spark about them that I haven’t seen in a long time.  The Giants will be better, but will they be good enough?  No idea.  They’ll probably make me eat my words.

New England over Miami: Not comfortable with this one either.  Always play each other tough, NE’s defense blows, Miami is coming off a heartbreaking loss to the Jets…I’m banking on NE’s desperation to win this game.  And also hoping some wise NE fan throws Brady to the ground and cuts that hair.  The hair is a problem, people.  Trust.

I tweeted this last week but had much love for it so I’m going to end with this thought on the Pats:  Gisele is to the Patriots what that Black Widow chick was to Robert Redford in The Natural.  BAD.  BAD MOJO. Til next week, friends!

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