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Posts Tagged ‘Sam Winchester’

Dear God, it's me, Nole.  What is it with me and hot guys in sunglasses?  More please!

Dear God, it's me, Nole. What is it with me and hot guys in sunglasses? More please!

I could do one of my usual scene by scene breakdowns of this week’s Supernatural but honestly I don’t feel like it and I don’t think that’s what is important to highlight this week.  We were back to honest to goodness fighting, albeit with 99% more apocalypse and it felt good to get down to battling again.  It also felt good to see Rufus, Jo and Ellen.  I hope that we’ll see more of them as the year and the war continue.

It was good to see Ellen, Rufus and Jo again.

It was good to see Ellen, Rufus and Jo again.

No, what’s important to talk about is the continuing gulf between Dean and Sam; a gulf that is apparently so wide that they’ve decided to get away from each other for awhile.  I really loved how this episode demonstrated the rift between the boys, beyond the obvious of Ellen calling them out on their behavior, but also showed that Dean still loves Sam, even though he resents what he did.  Dean’s reaction to having to give up that necklace that Sam gave him so many years ago seemed to me to be a nod to the love he still has for his brother, despite everything.

Um yeah, this is solely here because Jensen looks very hot.

Um yeah, this is solely here because Jensen looks very hot.

But that love is not enough anymore, as shown clearly but Dean’s distrust of Sam wanting to go off on his own and his reaction to Sam’s decision to leave the fight.  Also telling was what Dean thought was demons had Sam, he initially ran to the door to go find his brother first and ask questions later but reined himself in to formulate a plan with Ellen rather than run to Sam right away.  Dean’s always been smart but impulsive but he checked his natural instinct to protect his brother.  It wasn’t exactly covert but I thought it was a good way for the writers to let us know just where Dean’s head was at without him talking about it.

Physically close together but emotionally miles apart.

Physically close together but emotionally miles apart.

I found it interesting the way that Ellen greeted Dean with a hug and then a slap but did nothing to Sam.  Even though she said you boys she really focused on Dean.  This could be because of the fact that she definitely knows Dean better, but could it be an indication of something more?  It doesn’t seem like she knew what Sam had done (yet another example of Dean protecting Sam without really doing anything) but it helped to show how isolated Sam truly is right now.  Dean seems to be the important brother; the possible vessel of Michael, the talisman he wears can find God, the old friends/hunters seeming to be rallied around Dean rather than Sam…I found it a very interesting.  I know last season was rather Deancentric but it was still about Sam’s powers, Sam’s importance in the war, Sam’s deceit.  This season right now looks to be about Dean’s importance.  As a Dean girl, I’m not going to complain.

Another interesting nugget we learned was that God was indeed the one who blasted Sam and Dean into an airplane and put Castiel back together again.  For that I say Yay God!  But apparently God’s not hanging in heaven right now, he’s kicking it on earth Dogma style (if Alanis Morrisette makes a cameo this season I demand Chris Rock with her) and Cas needs to find him to get him to battle Lucifer.  Of course, I’m a little confused as to why God doesn’t just hook up with his favorite angel and the boys to do so, seeing as he saved them both a day or so ago.  Why do that and then go into hiding when your ex-pal is back to destroy earth?  I’m sure we’ll get an explanation at some point but that was a little weird.

You're welcome, Rameau!

You're welcome, Rameau!

Also, our favorite angel no longer has healing powers, thus rendering him useless to Bobby.  I had to laugh at Bobby’s reaction to that news…his attitude got passed down to Dean by osmosis because their angry responses to the angels was quite similar.  I also loved seeing that Castiel dry humor back, saying that God was not in a piece of flatbread.  Dammit, I’ll have to throw out that tortilla I’ve been saving that resembled the Virgin Mary!

This episode definitely wasn’t blow me out of the water good but it was a nice segway into the adventures of Dean & Cas.  I am really looking forward to seeing Mischa and Jensen play off each other, I think they’ve got great chemistry together (no, not calling Becky and the slash writers, although that is a lot of pretty!).  I do hope that Dean and Sam are not separated for a long time but I do feel it’s a good direction to take the show for now.  All last season I expected Dean to reach the breaking point with Sam but he never did, until maybe the last couple of episodes.  I think I like this better though, the boys stayed together then despite what was going on because they more or less needed to be.  Now, they have nothing to stop, the apocalypse is here, so they don’t really need to stay together.  While Sam’s soul searching and trying to get his shit together, Dean will hopefully have some in-depth conversations with Castiel and reach a point of forgiveness for his brother.  This is the break we anticipated, it just came later; emotionally they’re miles apart and now they’re physically going to be.  I find that fascinating.

Next week Sam sees Jessica, aka Tyra from Friday Night Lights and Dean and Cas begin their search for God.  Should be fun (and I will probably call her Tyra in the blog, just be prepared!)  I’m interested to see how the boys do apart.  See you next week to discuss it!

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Are you there, devil?  It's me, Sam Winchester!

Are you there, devil? It's me, Sam Winchester!

How sweet is it that my favorite returning fall show was the first to return?  The Pretty was back on my screen with a vengeance on Thursday night.  Vengeance, such a pretty word and rather fitting for Supernatural, no?  I loved the episode, naturally, so good to have our boys back.

Dean's expression matched my own, WTF were they doing in a plane as Lucifer rose?

Dean's expression matched my own, WTF were they doing in a plane as Lucifer rose?

Sympathy For The Devil picked up right where we left off last season, with Lucifer rising and our boys in much too close a proximity.  They can’t get out but all of a sudden they’re in an airplane confused as hell.  As was I, of course.  I assumed the angels had gotten our boys to safety but it seems a bigger boy has come out to play this season.  What’s Lucifer without God?

Sam tries several times to apologize for what he’s done but Dean isn’t having it.  I have to admit that I’m glad that the Sam/Dean tension is not going to magically disappear in their need to unite to fight the devil.  I’ll get more into Dean’s speech at the end later, because as usual it was powerful and moving and deserves it’s own discussion as I assume it’s going to be an overriding theme for much of the season.

Chuck!  No more needs to be said, I love him!

Chuck! No more needs to be said, I love him!

Who didn’t smile at the return of the Prophet Chuck?  There is something about that guy that just makes me light up.  I wish he’d go on the road with Sam and Dean, maybe as a new series (what, more Jensen is a bad thing?)  I love that the first thing he did was attack Sam as well.  What, he does deserve a little bit of a beat down doesn’t he?  Dean’s reaction to Sam’s full on Vader was interesting…does he think there’s a demon in his brother for real?

Dean's reaction to "Vader" Sam.  So much in that face.

Dean's reaction to "Vader" Sam. So much in that face.

Now, I knew going in that Misha Collins had been made a regular cast member, so news of Castiel’s smiting by the angels didn’t hit as hard as it could have had I not known or seen his name in the credits.  But still…it hurt to think about our Pretty Cas being smited by an archangel and exploding all over Chuck’s house.  I’m quite glad we were not subjected to the sight of that, for Castiel should never explode.  Preserve the Pretty!  How much did you love that Dean’s first reaction was to go find Cas anyway?

Dean uses his "friend" Castiel's method to get rid of the angels.  Loved it!

Dean uses his "friend" Castiel's method to get rid of the angels. Loved it!

Only Dean Winchester would call an angel an asshat.  I loved his rage at Zachariah.  The angels assumption that Dean would just fall in line cracked me up, do they not know the man at all?  Bonus points for the return of the word “douche.”  Nobody does it like Dean.  I adored that Dean used Castiel’s method of getting rid of the angels and blasted them right out of Chuck’s house.  He’s a sly one, our Dean.  And Chuck’s “this sucks ass” in reaction to the appearance and disappearance of the angels just slayed me.  This show mixes humor in at the oddest times but it works 99% of the time anyway.

I admit it, I am using this picture for it's beauty, although this was from that scene, hehe.

I admit it, I am using this picture for it's beauty, although this was from that scene, hehe.

A small but beautiful moment occurred when Sam gave Dean the hex back he’d made and Dean asked how he knew how to make it to hide them from demons and angels and Sam admitted that it was Ruby.  That pause and that look on his face hit the right note of fear of telling Dean, hesitance and even some shame.  I liked that that made Dean ask about his brother’s potential withdrawal from the demon blood and that it was addressed because I think we’d all be wondering about it.  Supernatural methadone indeed…yay God?  Then Sam tries to apologize again and Dean still won’t listen.  Jensen’s face, not looking at Sam and refusing to discuss it, showed a hint of that anger and hurt that we get to see in full force later.  It was a nice scene that really did a lot but didn’t seem all that significant on first viewing.

The devil's meatsuit, a lonely man who lost his wife and child violently.

The devil's meatsuit, a lonely man who lost his wife and child violently.

I didn’t really get absorbed into the whole “devil finds a meatsuit” thing but I do enjoy the actor they’ve gotten to play him.  He’s already been on two of my favorite shows, Dexter & Lost, so why not get him on a third?  And he can do creepy really well, so bonus.  I like that the devil had to get his permission as well, just like the rest of the angels do, nice continuity.  I felt for the character as the devil screwed with him, showing him his dead wife and reminding him of their murdered child.

Okay, I admit I would probably pull a Becky if I got near Dean.

Okay, I admit I would probably pull a Becky if I got near Dean.

How beautiful is it that Chuck sent a slash fanfiction writer to meet Sam and Dean?  And that her screenname was SamLicker81?  Of course I still fail to understand why people in love with male characters write them as gay, but it’s hilarious here so who cares?  Of course I wanted to bitchsmack her when she told Dean that he was not what she pictured, but her molestation of Sam just killed me.  How could Dean not be what she pictured?  Devastatingly gorgeous doesn’t work for her?  hehe Oh well, she’s a Sam girl.  She brought the big news that Michael’s sword was lost somewhere, so she served a purpose other than making me laugh.  Her “no” when Sam asked if she could quit touching him was awesome.  I wonder how they got rid of her?

Sam was rather hurt by Bobby's rejection.

Sam was rather hurt by Bobby's rejection.

Alright, I knew in my heart that Bobby was not Bobby when he laid into Sam but it was still effective as all hell, made doubly so because Dean just stood there and didn’t interfere in any way like he normally would have.  The beginning could have been real, anger at him for not listening, but when he told Sam to lose his number after they finished it, if they finished it, that’s when you knew he couldn’t be Bobby.  Sam’s face though, the puppy dog hurt there, really tugged at the heart.

As if that didn’t drive it home, Bobby’s private conversation with Dean really did.  Saying that John was right about Sam all along and they should have possibly killed him.  Again, what resounded here was that though Dean said “Bobby” he didn’t stop him or yell at him for even hinting that maybe they should have killed Sam.  How much does Dean agree with that?  How does he feel about it?  I can’t wait to see that play out over the season.

Yeah, not liking new Meg at all.  Hopefully she was one and done.

Yeah, not liking new Meg at all. Hopefully she was one and done.

Yay for the return of Meg, not so yay with the actress that portrayed her.  But I assume she was a oneshot so maybe the next one will be cooler.  How dare she have kissed him?  Not remotely hot.  Plus Meg was Sam’s girl.  Seeing Bobby with that knife to Dean and the real Bobby come through long enough to stab himself…that was beautiful.  His love for Dean shone through in that moment and brought to mind Daddy John’s own possession.  He peeked out for a minute but only to tell Dean to kill him, all for revenge on Yellow Eyes.  Bobby just again proved that he was the boys “real” father, at least for me.

The boys head to John’s storage locker and find dead demons littering the floor.  Dean’s “Oh thank God, the angels are here” cracked me up.  Zachariah then tells us that Dean is Michael’s sword, or his vessel.  Dean takes this news as only Dean would, with scoffing and anger.  “Life as an angel condom, that’s real fun!”  Of course, Zachariah gets all tough angel on Dean and breaks Sam’s legs to try to get Dean to comply.  Dean won’t.  Dean figures out that they can’t make him let Michael inside so he refuses.  Zachariah threatens Bobby with life in a wheelchair, Dean still says no.  He gives Dean stage 4 stomach cancer, coughing up blood he still says no.  He takes away Sam’s lungs, Dean asks that they just kill them both then.  Zach has no intention of doing so but plans on having lots more fun torturing the boys..angels and demons really aren’t so different are they?

Welcome back my pretty avenging angel!

Welcome back my pretty avenging angel!

Fortunately, in that moment, Castiel returns in a flash of white light.  He quickly kills the other two angels and faces off with Zachariah.  Zach is pretty stunned that Cas is still alive and well and Cas points out that it’s a good question and it’s a good question how Dean and Sam got away from Lucifer since the angels didn’t do it.  It’s not ever stated but it’s pretty heavily implied that God has decided to become an active participant in the war.  Zachariah is scared off and follows Cas’ orders of restoring the boys and leaves.  Castiel puts Noki and Sygil (spelling?) into Sam and Dean to hide them from all angels, including Lucifer.  He confirms that he was dead but disappears instead of telling them how he’s back.  I guess God will be everywhere in this season but not discussed?

I love that Bobby was screaming at his doctor when we returned.  Real Bobby being back was good to see.  Dean’s big speech for Bobby was a true Dean hubris moment.  I loved seeing that, even though he admitted to Sam that it was all bull.  Still, that was Dean, being tough for Bobby and pumping him up when he should be down.  I loved Bobby’s apology to Sam, letting him know he’d never cut him out of his life no matter what he did.  Sam’s relief and pretty smile was touching.

Dean's suppressing a lot of emotion all episode, it was nice to see it come out in the end.

Dean's suppressing a lot of emotion all episode, it was nice to see it come out in the end.

Of course, he doesn’t get to revel in Bobby’s forgiveness for long.  Dean tells him that they don’t have a chance to win this war, not that that’s going to stop him from fighting.  Sam again presses Dean to talk about it, about what Sam did and Dean’s feelings about it and this time he gives in.  Our boys have their best conversations next to the Impala, don’t they?  Dean tells him he tried but he can’t pretend that everything is alright.  It’s not and it’s never going to be.  He chose a demon over his own brother and look what happened.  Sam says he would give anything to take it back and Dean says he knows he would.  Dean tells him that he was the one he depended on the most and Sam let him down in ways he couldn’t even say.  He is having a hard time forgiving and forgetting.  Sam asks what he can do and Dean tells him there’s nothing.  He doesn’t think that they can ever be what they once were and he can’t trust him.  He walks towards the car, glances back at Sam and gets in.

Powerful, much needed moment.  It can’t go back to the way things were, not in one day.  They’re going to have to work to build each other up this whole season and I look forward to watching that play out.  I want to see if Sam’s tempted by blood again and Dean’s reaction to that.  Sam disappearing for an hour or two and Dean’s suspicion over that.  All of it is deserved and necessary.

All in all this was an excellent episode back.  I could have probably done with less Lucifer vessel stuff but I understand that they were establishing the man that would harbor the fallen angel and why he would.  I loved the humor but especially loved the angst.  I’m thrilled the show is back and starting off on a high note.  The season clips ahead, with the return of Ellen and Jo and that other hunter whose name escapes me have me excited.  Back next week with more!

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Sam and Dean watch as Lucifer rises.

Sam and Dean watch as Lucifer rises.

There are times when you think you know how something is going to go and you’re completely wrong.  This is one of those times.  There are times when you build something up in your mind only to be disappointed.  This is NOT one of those times.  The season finale of Supernatural, Lucifer Rising,  was not what I expected it to be.  It was not action packed, it was not a brother vs. brother showdown in the end and it did not leave both brothers lying on the ground, possibly dead.  Doesn’t matter though, because it was awesome all the same.  The Winchester boys are not at each others throats any longer and next season hopefully they can repair their rift and work together.  They’re going to have to.

Before I get too deep into it, let me give them props for returning to the “Carry On My Wayward Son” song in the intro.  Nothing could have been more fitting to show what the boys have been through and where they’re at when we pick back up.   I hope they play that song again at the end of the series and that the boys are really at peace and can lay their weary heads to rest.

Not every series could get away with starting their episode out by having a priest terrify and kill a bunch of nuns in a convent, but somehow it works here.  Azazel was inside the priest of course and we got to see the infamous yellow eyes again.  This act took place in 1972, setting into motion the events of today, the pairing up of Azazel, Lillith and that demon bitch Ruby, who we will discuss in more detail later.  But I will say this now…HAHAHAHAH DIE RUBY!!!!  You will SO not be missed.  In a later scene, Father Azazel gets directions from one of the dead nuns telling him that Lillith can break the seal and he has to find a very special child.  Our darling Sammy.

Amazingly Sam started off with some self awareness, admitting that Dean was right about him and he didn’t think he could turn off what was inside him anymore.  Sam took some minor steps towards redemption this episode and though Dean will forgive him, he needs to do a lot more to make things right.

Bobby laid into Dean for giving up on Sam.

Bobby laid into Dean for giving up on Sam.

I adored the talk between Dean and Bobby.  Dean was really and truly done with Sam by that point, questioning whether Sam was even his brother anymore, if he ever was.  I did not approve of Bobby calling Dean a whiny brat, nor do I agree, but I loved what he had to say about John.  He called him a coward and said that Dean was acting like him by pushing Sam away.  Then he got it really right and told him he was a better man than his father ever was and not to be him.  Again, this so brought home season one Dean, who initially thought that being just like dear old Dad was a good thing.  But Dean’s grown up and knows better now, and that speech he got from Bobby, though harsh, was far better parenting than he’s ever gotten in his entire life.  This goes here so I may as well say it now, I’m SO HAPPY that Bobby did not die.  I was very scared and though I wasn’t spoiled, there was talk of a death on Supernatural that would be upsetting.  Where was it?  Cause it sure as hell wasn’t Ruby!  Bobby lives, that’s all that matters!

Dean's rather out of place here, even with the beer and burgers.

Dean's rather out of place here, even with the beer and burgers.

Right after Bobby’s awesome words, Dean got sucked into some hideously tacky hotel type room, complete with gold leaf accents and crap.  Ick.  He looked funny there though.  Cas was there to greet him and then Zachariah showed up.  And to him I say, fuck you, Zach.  First he offers Dean burgers and then Ginger & Mary Ann, then he turns complete ass and informs Dean that all the seals have fallen except one and refuses to tell Dean much more than that.  Dean, as always, gets sarcastic and Zachariah tells him he swore his obedience.  Don’t you know, Zach, that Dean’s going to do what Dean’s going to do and there’s nothing you can say about it?

We then saw Sam and Ruby, who captured Lillith’s baby stealing #2 and had her tied down to get some information on where Lillith would be.  I loved her telling Sam he was “roided up” and calling them A-Rod and Madonna.  Oh, show, you do rock!  Sam proceeds with the torture with nary a care.

Dean leaves Sam an awesome message.

Dean leaves Sam an awesome message.

Meanwhile, Dean is feeling bad and calls and leaves him a beautiful message.  I’ll quote it here.  “Hey, it’s uh…me.  Look I’ll just get right to it.  I’m still pissed and I owe you a serious beatdown.  I shouldn’t have said what I said.  I’m not Dad.  We’re brothers, you know, we’re family and uh no matter how bad it gets, that doesn’t change.  Sammy, I’m sorry.”  And it cuts off.  Now THAT is what makes Dean so damn special.  Yes, Bobby had to push him, but he would have eventually done it anyway.  Words cannot express my ANGER when Sam heard the fake message courtesy of ho-bitch Ruby.  But that message was just wonderful.  It was truly Dean. I’m still pissed at you, I’m still gonna kick your ass, but I love you and I always will.  I shouldn’t have called you a monster, you’re not one, you just have some messed up stuff going on within you but together we can fight it.  That’s what he was saying.  Love.

Speaking of demon bitches, Ruby sure enjoyed watching Sam torture demon Cindy McClellan (for those of you uninitiated, that is yet another TWoP shout out, Cindy did some of the series recapping for the site when Demian was out for a couple months).  She stepped in to stop him from killing her though so he could “roid up” on her blood before he went after Lillith.  Cindy got the idea of letting the human she was controlling and let her try to appeal to Sam’s humanity.  It was a good idea and it worked for awhile.  The real Sam peeked out of the demonlike Sam and wasn’t on board with hurting an innocent person who just happened to be possessed.  But Ruby talked his gullible self into it and he threw Cindy in the trunk, screaming the whole way.

I couldn't find a picture of the "oh shit" face so I went with angry, hot Dean.

I couldn't find a picture of the "oh shit" face so I went with angry, hot Dean.

I love how that was immediately followed by Dean, bored in the stupid angel room, knocking a statue over as a sign of his displeasure.  Hilariously, Castiel was right behind him and Dean got kind of an “Oh shit” look on his face.  He asked Cas to take him to Sam but he wouldn’t and Dean didn’t back down.  He got right into Castiel’s face and demanded that he get him to his brother.  Of course, Cas then made the door disappear and Dean was stuck, but I did love that he wasn’t about to rescind his demands, even from an angel.

Ruby got more and more transparent as the episode went on, not that there was any doubt that she was an evil bitch anyway.  She started pushing Sam harder and harder when he started showing signs of disinterest in the original plan.  He didn’t want to drink the girl and he actually said that he thought maybe Dean had been right all along.  You think, Sam?  Then of course she used the phone message against him, turning Dean’s beautiful message into one filled with hate.  I loathe her.  That little smirk she gave when Sam heard that message that she changed…ugh.  I am so glad she died.

Zachariah tells Dean the angels want the Apocalypse.

Zachariah tells Dean the angels want the Apocalypse.

I love that not having a door in the suite of Zach and Cas (cute reference by the way) did not deter Dean and he tried to make his own using one of the hideous statues.  Of course his hole disappeared, but it was great all the same.  As was his “son of a bitch” when the hole went away.  Then Zachariah reappeared and Dean demanded some answers and finally got some.  Of course they were disturbing and quite uncool, but answers they were.  Zach let him know that Lillith was going to break the seals and admitted that he didn’t want it stopped.  Apparently the angels want to bring on the battle, a battle they plan to win, and bring paradise on earth.  Dean mentions the billions of people who will die during the “pissing contest.”  Zach poopooed that and referred to it as a planetary enema.  He knew Dean was contemplating attacking him but dissuaded him from doing so.  Then Dean tells him Sam will stop her and Zachariah admits that Sam has a part to play and he intends to see him play it.  He tells Dean that he’s still the chosen one, the one will stop it.  Not the Apocalypse but Lucifer himself.  Dean is completely blown away and asks where God is in all this.  “God?  God has left the building.”  Okay, so what exactly does that mean?   God is not on board with this, I hope, but somehow the angels have seized power?  I can only hope this means God will be on the side of Castiel, Dean and Sam because they’re kinda gonna be out there on their own, aren’t they?

Castiel tries to defend a cause he doesn't really believe in.

Castiel tries to defend a cause he doesn't really believe in.

Castiel then shows up as Dean tries to call Sam again.  Dean wants to know what they’re going to do to Sam and Cas tells him Sam’s going to do it to himself.  Dean asks him why he’s there and Castiel tells him he’s sorry how it ended.  Dean responds by punching him, hehe, hurting himself but pretending he didn’t.  Cas starts spouting off on destiny and Dean won’t hear of it.  He tells him it’s all lies and a way to keep them both in line.  Dean tells him what’s real is people in families and Castiel asks him what is so worth saving.  He sees all the pain in the world, Dean’s guilt and anger and confusion.  He tells him he’ll be at peace in paradise.  Dean makes him look at him and tells him to take his peace and shove it, pain is better than being a “Stepford bitch in paradise”.  I loved this whole scene.  Dean appealing to that humanity that has always lived in Castiel.  Cas tells him if he helps him, they’ll be hunted and they’ll die.  Dean tells him that if there’s anything worth dying for, this is it.  Dean calls him a spineless, soulless son of a bitch and says he doesn’t care cause he’s already dead.  Cas tries to speak and Dean tells him they’re done and he disappears.  Just a fantastic moment between two actors who brought their A+ game.  Plus, loads of pretty!

The fake Dean message destroyed Sam's doubts about going after Lillith.

The fake Dean message destroyed Sam's doubts about going after Lillith.

We cut back to Sam who is having his doubts and about to call a halt to everything when he stops and listens to the Dean message.  I outlined the real message above so I’ll do the fake message here.  “Listen to me you blood sucking freak.  Dad always said I’d either have to save you or kill you, well I’m giving you fair warning.  I’m done trying to save you.  You’re a monster, Sam, a vampire.  You’re not you anymore and there’s no going back.”  Those are the key words for Sam.  Calling him a “freak” and a “monster” is enough to set him off.  He tells Ruby to bring out the girl and has his feast of blood, presumably.

Castiel & Dean understand each other.

Castiel & Dean understand each other.

Dean, meanwhile, is finally about to have one of his beloved cheeseburgers when Castiel appears behind him and throws him against a wall.  He draws a knife  and looks into Dean’s eyes, giving him a silent message.  He then cuts his arm open in a nice parallel to Ruby blood giving scenes.  I thought he was going to get Dean to drink but he draws on the wall and uses it to send Zachariah away.  Cas tells him they have to find Sam and that Lillith dying is the final seal.  They head off to see the Prophet Chuck!  I knew he was gonna be back but I was still happy to see him.  Chuck was busy trying to buy some women for sex, since there’s not going to be a tomorrow.  Hilarious. Chuck tells them where Sam is and the archangel appears, Cas sends Dean to the convent and stays with Chuck to face whatever is coming.  Chuck, hilariously, puts his arm around him and removes it when Cas looks at him.  Love.  Deep and abiding love for those two.

My second favorite moment of the night.

My second favorite moment of the night.

Lillith starts her ceremony and Sam shows up to stop her, first killing all her minions with nary a sound.  He pins Lillith to the alter and Ruby sees Dean coming and shuts the doors, cutting him off from his brother.  Sam tells Lillith he’s been waiting for this for a long time and commences with mojo.  But even as he’s doing it, he can hear Dean calling him and he stops.  And that, right there, is a great thing.  Sam can still hear Dean in the midst of his finally getting at Lillith.  She pushes the right buttons, though, and taunts him and calls him a freak and a monster.  So, of course, he kills her, his eyes going all the way demon black.  I thought for sure we had lost him for good then.

Lillith's blood opens the seal.

Lillith's blood opens the seal.

Lillith’s blood started to flow into a circle and Ruby tells him he did it.  Sam asked what he did and Ruby told him he opened the door and Lucifer was free.  Sam said, no he stopped her and Ruby then tells him that Lillith was the last seal.  Sam is horrified.  Ruby talks about how nobody knew what she was doing and how awesome she was to lie that whole time.  Sam tries to use the mojo on her but he’s all out of it from hitting Lillith.  He tried to accuse Ruby of poisoning him with her blood but she points out that it was all Sam’s choices that brought them there.  He was the only one who could do it apparently, the chosen one.  Just like with Dean, Lillith tells Sam he’s going to have anything he wants as payment.

Holy crap was Dean beautiful as he headed toward Ruby.

Holy crap was Dean beautiful as he headed toward Ruby.

Dean breaks down the door though and she tells him he was too late.  In my favorite moment of the night, Dean says “I don’t care” and Sam grabs her arms and Dean stabs that demon bitch.  Sam says he’s sorry and a hole opens in the floor.  Dean grabs him and says “Sammy, let’s go” but Sam holds him as well and says “He’s coming” and we’re awash in white light…the second time in a day that one of my series ended with a white screen.  Clearly my shows want to torture me some for good measure, leaving me hanging like that.

Farewell, Ruby, you will not be missed!

Farewell, Ruby, you will not be missed!

Well, I got slightly wordy…what else is new?  But so much happened and I just wanted to capture it all.  I taped this episode so I could watch Grey’s but I flipped over on commercials and got up and watched pretty much the whole show live.  That’s how much I had to see it, how much I had to know.  I couldn’t even wait til today to watch.

To me, the two most important things that happened were that Castiel chose Dean and Sam and Dean seem to be together again.  Cas turned away from the grand angelic plan of world conquering and tried to stop the Apocalypse by getting Dean to Sam.  They were not successful but somehow I don’t think that is going to matter to Zachariah and his fellow angels who are in favor of the plan.  I really and truly hope that the “God’s left the building” thing indicates that the angels are working on their own and that a higher power may be shining down on our boys.

I don’t know if Sam and Dean are back to being fine yet, I’m quite sure that they have some work to do, but Sam does appear to be truly horrified by what he did and remorseful about it.  They will clearly have to have a major talk (once they get away from Lucifer that is) and apologies need to be said.  I hope Sam gets to hear Dean’s real message sometime.  Maybe it’ll still be in his phone and he’ll hear it by accident and be properly touched?  When it came down to it though, even when Sam was at his darkest, he heard his brother.  That makes all the difference in the world, doesn’t it?  I think that they can be repaired, but I know when Sam said he was sorry that Dean’s face didn’t say, all’s well, no problem.  So we have to wait some 4 or 5 months to see that play out don’t we?

I’m sorry for all the yammering, I’m really trying to wrap my mind around everything.  I feel I have written a lot without saying anything.  Sam’s major weakness is pride, he will not back down if someone calls him a monster or a freak.  Ruby and Lillith used this against him the whole time.  Dean can’t really lord it over Sam that he was used by Ruby because Dean was also being used by the angels at the same time.  It’s just that Dean’s lucky enough to have one angel who listened to him and believed in him enough to break ranks.  I love that that was so well set up…we saw that Castiel questioned decisions along the way and that he truly didn’t agree with some of the things he was asked to do.  It made his break all the more real.  I’m thrilled that Misha Collins has been added to the regular cast; the chemistry between him and Jensen is palpable and I shall definitely look forward to he and Sam meeting up again.

It seems instead of battling one another, or good battling evil, we’re going to have our guys battling both good and evil.  That’s quite an ambitious undertaking and I do hope the show is not biting off more than it can chew, but I am on board from start to finish.  The finale may have been different than I thought it would be but it didn’t begin to disappoint.  The summer cannot end soon enough!

All pictures from Supernaturalseries.com

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Brothers on the brink.

Brothers on the brink.

Wow…I don’t know if I’ve ever attempted to write a blog where I find myself having a hard time putting into words what I want to say.  This Supernatural episode was not as action packed as I thought it would be but that didn’t matter to me whatsoever because I was so caught up in an emotional torrent that I probably couldn’t have handled anymore.  Plus next week looks killer, so I’m not complaining.

Every now and then a TV show can manage to put together an episode that makes you feel involved, like you’re there and you’re part of it.  It’s rare, I am clearly quite invested in all of my programs but maybe not to the level that I seem to be Supernatural.  I came out of watching that episode feeling like I had been on the receiving end of every single one of those Winchester punches.  I felt bruised and battered and drained.  I spent the whole episode cringing, sighing, yelling and crying.  Okay, it was only a little tear when Dean cried but still, I did cry.  This by no means was one of those perfect episodes that they bring me now and then but it was damn good.

Before I delve into the meat of the episode, I have to throw out major kudos to both Jared and Jensen for this episode.  I felt Sam’s struggle and though I spent the majority of the episode pissed off at him (haha what a new reaction that is for me!), I felt sorry for him as well.  Jensen just ripped my heart out when Dean found that line he was unwilling to cross for his brother.  Also major kudos to that kid who plays young Sammy, that kid’s a great actor and I adore him.

I have to say, after this final showdown and whatever fallout occurs, I damn well better never EVER hear Sam say again that Dean is not strong enough.  He hasn’t used the word weak but that’s what he’s saying over and over again when he questions his brother’s strength.  Not only better he never utter those words, he better apologize and admit his brother is the stronger man.  Dean was tortured on a rack in hell for 30 years, Sam couldn’t even handle it for a two minute hallucination.

Sam used his mom to further his own agenda.

Sam used his mom to further his own agenda.

Speaking of hallucinations, for the first time in the history of this show I loathed Mary Winchester.  There she was implying Dean was weak and Sam was strong and was doing what was right.  What, they couldn’t have had John appear and do that, I’d expect it from him!  I know, she was in Sam’s head and not real but I was telling her to shut the hell up the whole time she was on my screen.

I love little Sam, so much bigger than big Sam.

I love little Sam, so much bigger than big Sam.

I did enjoy how little Sam’s bitch wasn’t about Sam becoming a demon but was instead about him giving up his chance at a real life and going along with his family.  This actually felt real, even though I call bullshit to Sam’s theory that Jessica never would have died had he been there to save her.  I’m sure he does feel that way inside but he knows it’s not true, the YED told him as much.  But, it’s a hallucination, clearly they’re not going to be the truth tellers of the world.

Hallucinatory Dean said all the things that real Dean never would.

Hallucinatory Dean said all the things that real Dean never would.

The granddaddy of the hallucinations was of course Dean himself.  It was truly beautiful watching the scenes cut from mean Dean laying into Sammy up to real Dean pouring his heart out to Bobby and saying he would not sacrifice Sam to save the world.  Mean Dean was saying all the things that I kinda wanted to say to Sam but knew that real Dean never would.  He was terribly hurtful and both boys rocked that moment.  When Sam begged him not to say that he was a monster, that he couldn’t handle that from him, that was beautiful.  That was that moment last week in the car put into words.  Dean thinking that of him would be the most hurtful thing Sam could imagine.  Of course it only made what happened later more poignant.

Cas isn't too comfortable with his actions.

Cas isn't too comfortable with his actions.

Before I could get to feeling too badly for old Sam, along came Castiel to inexplicably free him.  Um, Cas, I know you have your orders, dear angel, but that royally sucked, especially coming on the heels of your being rather dickish to Dean.  He got Dean to pledge himself to God and the angels and he was just so cold.  I know he has to be right now but I miss my cuddly Cas.  At least he’s still showing signs of being conflicted, I suppose.  I will forgive him for this move if it pays off and because Anna got yanked back into heaven (presumably anyway) on his watch, so that pleased me.  Of course she was questioning him the way I was questioning him so I didn’t loathe her as much as I usually do, but she’s gone, so oh well!

Bobby tried to be a good father to Sam.

Bobby tried to be a good father to Sam.

What a moment between Sam and Bobby when Sam was trying to escape.  Bobby was trying to talk him down and Sam was calling him on his inability to shoot him.  That brings to mind the question, would John have killed him had he been there?  Probably.  But Bobby couldn’t and Sam thanked him for that by knocking his ass out with his gun.  Oh Sam.  That was kinda my theme of the show, by the way.  I was saying, Oh Sam.  Oh Bobby.  Oh Cas.  And of course I just kept saying My Dean…my poor Dean.

How beautiful was it that Sam thought he was going to outsmart his brother and Dean caught up to him in no time flat?  Dean knew Sam would try to change his pattern and he went against all of Sam’s instincts and there he was.  Suck it, Sammy.  Well I guess he already did, watching him tear into Ruby’s blood just pissed me off.  Dean damn well better get to kill her.  Of all the unforgivable things Sam has done this season, stopping Dean from killing Ruby ranks right up there; made worse by his choosing her over Dean when Dean offered to go with him.  Jackass. And what makes Sam so sure that killing Lillith will stop this thing?  I couldn’t help but wonder when Ruby was telling him about the human that the devil had to form, of Sam himself.  I’m sure killing Lillith is some kind of red herring to the real seal, after all, Dean’s supposed to close it since he started it.  We’ll see!

Dean's still so beautiful even when fighting with his brother.

Dean's still so beautiful even when fighting with his brother.

And then we got down to it, didn’t we?  Sam telling Dean that he had to get Lillith, that he was the only one who could and Dean pointing out that it was his job, what he was brought back for.  Then Sam tells him he’s not strong enough.  AGAIN.  Dammit.  Then Sam gets a little worked up about Dean telling him what to do and asking him to trust him as he has all these years.  But Sam, really, have you?  This season you certainly haven’t.  Dean then says it, the thing hallucinatory Dean said, albeit with a different level of caring and emotion involved.  He tells Sam that if he truly knows what he’s doing then that makes him worse, it makes him a monster.  This time, though, Sam asks him to say it even though he knows what’s coming.  Hallucination no longer, reality steps in and they fight.

Sam was destroyed to hear that monster word come out of his brothers mouth.

Sam was destroyed to hear that monster word come out of his brothers mouth.

Every punch, every push, every throw hurt in a way none of their other fights have hurt before.  They are well and truly separated now.  Then Sam actually tried to choke his brother.  That was terrible.  “You don’t know me.  You never did and you never will.”  And that’s when Dean finally said it.  “You walk out that door, don’t you ever come back.”  Sam just looks at him like he’s shit on his shoe and walks out.  I knew it would hurt to watch them break but I don’t think I knew quite how much.

This is how we left Dean, uttler destroyed by what has happened with Sam.

This is how we left Dean, uttler destroyed by what has happened with Sam.

A lot of important stuff got said in this episode, one of the best for me was when Dean pointed out to Sam that he was right there.  He was back from hell so why the hell was Sam so determined to make Lillith pay?  It’s what I’ve been saying for awhile now and it was great to hear that expressed.  Sam finally got spill all his anger at having to follow his brother.  I may not agree with it but I understand the resentment.  Dean got to reiterate the fact that he was not going to let his brother become a demon to save the world.

I’m writing this off of one viewing, except for a rewatch of the end, so I’m sure I’m missing stuff and will have to go back and add things after I think about them some more, but I had this on my mind so I’m getting it out while I can.  I forgot to mention that I loved that after Dean pledged himself to the angels and Bobby asked him about it, he said that he damn well doesn’t believe that they’re necessarily doing right but he was going to do anything for Sam.  Sam clearly doesn’t feel the same way, but that’s Dean to the core and I loved that he hadn’t magically bought into Castiel’s program.  I think it’s that that might just save Sam when it comes down to it.

Next week, the finale.  Chuck’s back, which is awesome.  I still fear for Bobby, but at least he made it through this episode.  I have great trepidation and excitement over what might happen and I know that it will probably make me feel as strongly as this one did.  I hope our boys can get back together, I loved that Sam even expressed that to Ruby, the hope that when it was all over they could come back together.  From your mouth to god’s ears, Sammy, if he’ll listen to potential demons that is.

Back with pictures and more thoughts later!

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From Jimmy to Castiel and back again.

From Jimmy to Castiel and back again.

I found Supernatural’s The Rapture episode to be quite ironic.  Here was a man of faith who was ready and willing to give himself up to the service of the lord and a year later he’s released and so disenchanted as to stop saying grace at the family meal.  I can’t say as I blame him, it was pretty crappy for him to lose a year of his life and later find out that he can’t go back to it at all, but still, what a message.

I feel kinda bad saying I didn’t really enjoy this episode nearly as much as I thought I would but that’s no fault of the actor.  I thought Misha Collins did a great job in dual roles, he really did make Jimmy seem like a totally different guy than Castiel.  I think it was probably too much Cas, a random appearance by Anna that had virtually no purpose and too little Dean and Sam.  What was the point of having Anna appear and tell Sam he seemed different when Dean gets to see him drinking his demon blood in the very same episode?  If they’d have let that one simmer in Dean’s mind for awhile, fine, but otherwise it was pointless.  Unless she appeared later to Dean and set up that Bobby call with him.  Then I can buy it.  Maybe we’ll find that out next week.  It’s just that the last 5 to 10 minutes of the program were filled with the moments I’ve been dying to see so they kinda overshadowed the tale of how Jimmy became Castiel for me.

Castiel gives Dean the cold angel shoulder when he returns.

Castiel gives Dean the cold angel shoulder when he returns.

So it seems that Castiel got dragged back into heaven for awhile as a punishment for having helped Dean figure out to bring Chuck to save Sam in the last episode.  It was rather chilling to see Castiel turn back into Castiel pre-Dean influence, a guy who was going to listen to the big bossman and not question anymore. “I learned my lesson while I was away Dean, I serve heaven.  I don’t serve man, and I certainly don’t serve you.”  Damn, that was pretty harsh.  Especially coming right after Sam’s revelation.  I truly wouldn’t have been surprised if those combined to drive Dean to want to quit, but then I know my boy.

Cas moves from Jimmy's daughter back into Jimmy.

Cas moves from Jimmy's daughter back into Jimmy.

Nice use of Jimmy’s daughter Claire as Castiel’s temporary home, it brought back memories of freaky child Lillith, who is far more chilling than adult sexy wannabe Lillith.  Sadly it appears we are not done with her.  Sigh.  I feel sad for Jimmy at never being able to go home again but at least now his wife and daughter know he wasn’t nuts and hopefully they can have happy lives.  I feel for them all.

Dean's reaction to Sam's blood drinking.

Dean's reaction to Sam's blood drinking.

And finally, the moment we’ve all been waiting for….Dean saw Sam drinking blood.  I must say, they surprised me by having it be just a small part of the episode, but I think that was to set up the surprise ending.  Kudos, as always, to Jensen Ackles for that look of stunned shock followed by surprise as Sam aimed mojo hand at him.  I believed for a brief moment he thought his brother was going to attack him.  Then he quickly stumbled out of the way so Sam could remove the demon from Amelia (finally they use my name on this show, well part of it, I’m just Amy and of course she is inhabited by a demon.  I was feeling smug about gorgeous Jimmy’s wife having the same nickname as me til I saw the demon eyes!)  Also lovely in that moment was Castiel inside Claire watching with his nonjudgmental angel eyes.  I thought the little girl did a good job of not showing any emotion or reaction to blood drinking Sammy.

Sam got his juice and then worked his mojo.

Sam got his juice and then worked his mojo.

I enjoyed that Dean wasn’t saying anything in the car until Sam asked him to lay into him.  I think it probably resonated more for Dean to just talk calmly and tell Sam that he wasn’t mad.   Dean actually telling Sam not to explain himself because he doesn’t care was definitely a powerful moment.  For Dean to say something like that to Sam, who he has looked out for all of his life…what does that mean, you know?  I mean, clearly he does, but in that moment, for just a moment, doesn’t that have to scare Sam a little bit?  Then Dean says of course he is disappointed but he’s mostly just tired and done.  Of course, Bobby then conveniently calls and summons the boys to his place for Sam’s intervention.  I did adore them letting Sam walk into the room and then slamming the door on him together, telling him he was the big demon problem.  Excellent moment.

Dean & Bobby trick Sam into captivity.

Dean & Bobby trick Sam into captivity.

And then…the scenes ahead.  Hot damn!  I could not be any more excited for an upcoming episode than I am right now.  Brother vs. brother.  Sam vs. Lillith.  Dean bargaining with the angels (is he going to become one?  Cas touches him like he did Jimmy).  Sam tortured by Alastair???  Dean FINALLY going after Ruby (he damn well better get to kill that bitch).  And then, those words we were wondering about, Dean telling Sam that if he walks out that door he better never come back.  Gauntlet effectively thrown.  Of course, it will again be Sam walking away from Dean and not vice versa, but I guess we always knew that Dean couldn’t walk away from Sam.  I can’t wait for next week!

PS.  One minor bitch before I go, since when does Sam get to call him “Cas?”  That’s a Dean nickname, dammit and I don’t appreciate it.  I did appreciate some more TWoP shoutouts, with Dean calling Sam “Ginormo” and the mention of the mojo hand.   Love your viewers, Kripke!

Photos from SupernaturalSeries.com

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Dean wasn't embracing the 3rd brother thing anymore than we were.

Dean wasn't embracing the 3rd brother thing anymore than we were.

Well, well, wasn’t that interesting???  I just finished watching Supernatural’s Jump The Shark episode and I’m glad to say that my faith in Kripke remains strong.  This episode wasn’t about a third brother, this was all about John Winchester and his two sons, the two sons who are on their way to a collision.  And it was an interesting character steady on both Sam & Dean.

Adam, the Winchester brother who got a normal life, til killed by a ghoul.

Adam, the Winchester brother who got a normal life, til killed by a ghoul.

Perhaps I’m more sensitive to this for having recently devoured season 1, but this episode could have been in that season.  Adam was of course a representation of original recipe Sammy, the kid who was in college and had a life and was doing normal things.  Sam was a conglomerate of his current self and old Dean, embracing the hunting and trying to get Adam to come into the hunting lifestyle while being consumed by revenge.  Dean was still Dean, as I said before I think he’s changed the least but grown the most.  Which might sound weird, but I mean to say that he’s still all about his family but he now really sees that family for what they are.  He doesn’t hero worship John anymore and while still protective of Sam, he sees that darkness in his brother and knows deep down that it’s a problem he’s going to have to deal with.

Sam & Dean had different reactions to little bro, except both were jealous in their own ways.

Sam & Dean had different reactions to little bro, except both were jealous in their own ways.

I spent the first half of the episode wishing John Winchester would burn in hell (again, some more!) for putting that hurt look in Dean’s eyes.  Yep, my protective instinct when it comes to Dean was activated immediately upon Dean hearing that kid claim to be John’s son.  I absolutely loved that Dean’s reaction was to be prepared to kill whatever monster was lying about his father.  The holy water in the glass, the silver, the gun under the table and the glare on my boys darling face were all just vintage Dean Winchester.  And he was angry and he had every right to be, but as I said, the hurt was still there in the eyes, in the disbelief in his tone as Adam talked about going to ball games with Dad and seeing him every birthday.  It made me angry to imagine Dean’s birthday going unnoticed all those years, I bet John rarely thought of it if he was even with him.  No, I don’t include Sam here because I know Dean gave him birthdays, that’s just what Dean would do.  Dean had nobody taking care of him while both Adam and Sam did.  Not perfect by any means but at least they had someone.

Sam is becoming more and more Johnlike.

Sam is becoming more and more Johnlike.

What I really found fascinating was the fact that Sam was jealous as well.  He seemed like he was bonding with the kid while Dean didn’t want anything to do with him.  I didn’t catch the jealousy until Dean confronted him about wanting to teach Adam how to be a hunter.  Sam just threw Adam’s life out the door and Dean wasn’t having him do that.  Sam’s come a long way from that law student who just wanted a normal life, he pretty much sneered at the idea of that for Adam.  So that begs the question, what exactly is Sam’s purpose here beyond vengeance?  Because it seems to me that he teamed up with Ruby and has gone darker and darker because he wanted to be out of this life someday and someday soon.  He said that in one episode a month or so back.  But if he thinks that normal life is out of reach for someone like Adam, what does he think awaits him?  I am very curious to know just what he’s looking for here, once Lillith is vanquished.

One cannot overlook the symbolism of Sam being tied down and having the ghoul Adam and his sister lapping up his blood.   Did Sam stop to think that he did the same thing to Ruby?  I didn’t see any realization there, of course he was worried about dying at the time but it’d be nice to have a scene addressing that sometime soon.  I did enjoy them noticing something different in his blood but I would like to see a little more awareness there.  Maybe Dean will point it out to him whenever he finds out about Sammy’s secret pasttime.

For all the hurt and jealousy that Dean had over Adam, he still wanted to protect him from the life that he and Sam had.  That’s just one of the things that makes Dean so special, isn’t it?  He can look beyond the jealousy and desire for revenge and see the bigger picture.  I really loved that in the end when they were burning Adam’s body, Sam suggested that Dean give Castiel a call to bring their brother back and Dean didn’t even consider it.  He doesn’t want to bring him back to a life dealing with the world their father brought them and he is in a better place.

Of course that last scene also brought on the comment of the night, maybe the comment of the year.  “You know, I finally get why you and Dad butted heads so much.  You two are practically the same person.  I mean I worshiped the guy, you know?  I dressed like him, I acted like him, I listened to the same music.  But you were more like him than I will ever be.  I see that now.”  And Sam says, “I’ll take that as a compliment,” to which Dean responds, “You can take it anyway you want.”   That, right there, is the sign of Dean’s growth and Sam’s descent.  Dean doesn’t mean that as a compliment anymore.  He sees his father for the flawed being that he was and realizes his brother is the same way.  The thirst for vengeance drove John Winchester and it now drives Sam, to the point that they were willing to sacrifice the happiness of their own family.  Sam didn’t give a damn if Adam had a life, he was going to teach him to be a hunter.  Just like John did to his other two sons.

It really staggered me to hear Dean say those words to his brother and to have Sam decide that was a compliment.  Sam didn’t care to be compared to Daddy when we first met him but now it’s all good.   And Dean wasn’t blind to his father but he accepted and admired him.  He doesn’t accept and admire Sam right now though, does he?

Like everyone else, I was wary of the whole third brother thing but since it was really about the two brothers it worked just fine for me.  I am not sorry that the real Adam was dead and they never met him; he’s a complication we didn’t need going forward; but using him to demonstrated just how the lives of the Winchesters have changed worked.  It was a way of showing their relationship devolve without them arguing or confronting one another.  Not subtle but not over the top.

Next week, Castiel is back and apparently we get to meet the man our angel’s been inhabiting.  It should be fun!

I’ll add better pictures when SupernaturalSeries.com gets them up, the CW’s selection was pathetic!

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Dean, so much more than pretty face

Dean, so much more than pretty face

Anyone who’s read even one of my Supernatural blogs might have picked up on the not so well hidden fact that I’m an unabashed Dean lover.  I don’t exactly attempt to hide my love for all things Dean Winchester, from the looks to the sarcasm to the attitude.  All of it just works for me.  This weekend I took it upon myself to suspend my Veronica Mars rewatch after I finished season 2 (Yeah, I still like to pretend season 3 didn’t happen) and pick up with Supernatural season 1.  And instead of just hitting a few episodes I managed to watch the entire season.  Yes, I’m aware that I need a life, that’s not what this is about!  This is what happens when football season ends.  I need new things to obsess about, so here I am.

Rameau is doing a season 1 episode break down, this won’t be that because I didn’t have the patience to stop after each episode to write about it.  She’s a much stronger woman than I am.  I’m just going to talk about my overall reaction to the brothers knowing what I now know.  I’ve tried to throw out my current irritation with Sam when watching the season, but that’s pretty much impossible.  Every time he questions his brother and gives him attitude it serves to remind me just how he’s looking down upon his brother these days.  And honestly?  It pisses me right the hell off.  Because while Dean had dickish moments, he always loved his brother more than anybody.  He carried the weight of caring for him on his shoulders since he was 4 years old and Sam has the utter gall to question his strength now?  It really makes me almost too angry.

What’s funny is it’s quite clear that in the early going of the series they clearly were trying to make Sam the rootable brother, the one we’d all identify with and feel sorry for.  He tried to have a normal life and his crappy family drew him back in.  I can and do sympathize with that, nobody likes to have their life path laid out before them the way his was.  But so was Dean’s.  And Dean gets no sympathy from Sam?  For being the brother that bent to his father’s plan and will, Sam looks down on Dean.  Sam had a couple of moments of awareness peak through and it’s clear that he does come to understand eventually just how much Dean cared for and protected him growing up.  I guess that further demonstrates how far they’ve come because Sam seems to have forgotten that this season.

Like season 1, Sam’s all caught up in revenge to the point that he doesn’t give a damn most of the year about regular everyday cases and saving lives.  Dean constantly battles with him over doing what’s right while Sam wants to go find their father and get revenge.  I understand it, it’s just an interesting parallel to this season.  Sam has his brother back, whose death is what drove him for his desire for revenge but he doesn’t even appreciate it.  He can’t put aside the thirst to get back at Lillith despite the fact that he has his brother there by his side, and once again, he’s busy resenting him.

Dean always carried the weight of caring for Sam on his shoulders, that's a lot of weight.

Dean always carried the weight of caring for Sam on his shoulders, that's a lot of weight.

Though my anger issues with Sam don’t appear to have abated, neither does my love for Dean.  Because he really drew me in from moment one.  And it’s not just the looks, though of course they help.  It was his determination to do what was right and his desire to protect his family.  It was those little flashes of pain and hurt when Sam belittled the family and made a mockery of his loyalty to their father.  It’s that instinctual bond he had with the people they helped, from hot women to lonely, scared children.  It’s funny because prior to this season had you asked me who the brother was that was better with people I would have said Sam.  And I would have been completely wrong.  Sam might be better at talking to people but Dean’s the one who understands them and reaches them.

Dean has stayed remarkably consistent over all 4 seasons so far.  His number one priority has always been his family.  And it always will be.  Now we know this season is going to be the ultimate test of that and it’s going to be fascinating to watch Jensen work through that.  I have always appreciated his acting but now I’m seeing all the extra little expressions that he throws in that make Dean so reachable, so understandable.  I’m not saying Jared doesn’t do that for Sam, he definitely has moments, but it’s Dean that I’m drawn to and I’m going to notice more of the little things with him.

The memory of failing to protect Sam haunts Dean.

The memory of failing to protect Sam haunts Dean.

Something Wicked was one of the more powerful episodes of the season that really brought my Dean love and Sam anger into focus.  That’s the episode where the shtriga is taking the life force out of children and it comes out that it came after Sam when he was a kid.  Dean got tired of watching out for his brother and left him alone to go watch video games and came home to find the thing attacking Sam.  He froze and before he could get off a shot his dad was there to scare the thing away.  He took Sam into his arms and gave Dean hell for not protecting his brother.  That’s quite a lot to lay on a 10 or 12 year old, isn’t it?  And he’s had that on him since he was 4.  Dean kept the story from Sam for most of the episode and finally told him toward the end when Sam was giving him attitude over having to risk the older brother to catch the thing.  Sam finally seemed to grasp at that moment just how much Dean had always cared for him and how that one instance of not protecting him had weighed on him for 15 or 20 years.  He actually realized just what Dean had carried with him.  I wish he hadn’t forgotten.  He also thanked him in Salvation…where’s that knowledge these days?

So, really, that’s what makes me love and adore Dean Winchester.  That sacrifice.  Sam didn’t have a normal growing up experience but Dean did his best to make sure that he didn’t have as bad a one as Dean himself did either.  From giving him the last of the Lucky Charms to stealing Christmas presents for him, Dean always took care of Sam.  I can’t help but love that.

I don’t know when I’ll do the season 2 rewatch, football gets to return to my life for glorious draft weekend next week, so it’ll be sometime after that.  I can’t help but wonder if I had watched this before season 4 started if I’d have the same resentment for Sam as I do now?  Probably not to this level, but it sure has influenced my viewing this time out.  Maybe season 2 I’ll be less irritated.  Probably not, but I’ll try.  It’ll still be good to revisit the early Supernatural and watch the evolution of the brother’s relationship.  I want, more than anything, for Dean and Sam to get back to a good place with one another, not for me, but for Dean.  You know that’s what is most important to him and he deserves whatever little bit of happiness he can get.

All photos from SupernaturalSeries.com.

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